More than 25 years ago I finished my university studies in Theology (not kidding). And after two years selling books and philatelic investment (not kidding), I decided to study an MBA, with the aim of re-launching my career and developing those skills needed for me to be a better worker and manager. I was accepted at IESE and I finished the master in 1993. I was the only one in my class that was unconscious enough to implement the business plan he had drawn up for the course entitled “New business ventures”, taught by prof. Pedro Nueno. I felt as an entrepreneur.

MY ENTREPRENEURIAL CONCERNS

With the clarity afforded by emotional distance and elapsed time, I must admit that my entrepreneurial concerns were rather rare, not to say zero, by the end of the master. My “self-employment” was rather the result of the need to get a good salary (my eldest daughter was born six months after having created the company) that the commitment to consciously add value to society through the creation of employment, which is what I had been taught at IESE as a definition for a good entrepreneur. I said “no” to two offers, among other things because the possibility to earn more in the long run and being my own boss sounded attractive. Poor me. Big mistake in terms of personal appreciation and social context. I had no experienced in almost anything and the post-Barcelona’ 92 crisis and post Expo’92 of Seville were raging in Catalonia and in the whole Spain.

THE BEGINNING

Four months after initiating the “venture” my motivation was very low. Almost anything of what I had been foreseen in the business plan was reached. And almost everything what I had not foreseen was evident and grew every morning arriving at the firm: difficulties with banks to get a line of credit (financing is how it was called at IESE); chronic lack of liquidity in the firm’s current accounts (cash management, was its pompous technical name); problems with “face and eyes” with the employees whom I had hired (Human Resources, was the name..); misunderstandings with my partner (company policy, call it), actual inability to meet the deadlines of our product, in this case a weekly magazine production (logistics and management of the value chain is its academic name); lies and deception of distributors when it comes to declaring and payment of the copies sold (marketing and business management is the conceptual schema). I could go to infinity and beyond.

Many days I didn’t sleep (literally) thinking about what I was going to find next morning: employees not coming, problems with distributors and production… problems with my partner. Suffering. Where was the glamour of IESE´s classrooms?

WHY DID I KEEP ON GOING AHEAD..?

In a word, why did I remain trying to forge ahead with my own company? What mysterious spell poisoned my business soul? Why, once repositioned as an “Executive”, after my dismal failure, did I always want to be an entrepreneur again? Why, after another fifteen years and after reaching a good wage, recognition and business achievement did I sin again? Perhaps I will explain it in the next post of this blog…

A QUESTION..

Has anyone a similar experience to share?